Starring: Bruce Willis

I thought this would be another run-of-the-mill Forces of Nature Blowing Up NYC movie, but alas, it was not. After NY was blown up, the only other explosion was when Paris was destroyed. Oh well.

Armageddon was another sappy predictable about the near destruction of the world. Most of it looked like a giant Sprint commercial- lots of ethnically dressed people all listening to radios in fields and by Taj Mahal-like structures. The US citizens were represented by children who looked like they just stepped out of a 1950s Disney science film playing on dusty midwestern streets.

At least I’ve discovered my new calling in life- I want to be the person who decides how much time is left in movies. In this one, time was always running out. I can picture the committee deciding on the screenplay- “I think there should be 3.5 minutes left before the asteroid blows up.” “No, I think 7 minutes would make the audience feel more of a sense of hope” “You’re wrong. 2.9 minutes would drive home the concept of pathos” Look for me in the next major big budget Hollywood disaster movie credits!

One Response to “Armageddon”

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